Congregation of Kindness

Recently, some very tragic events that have occurred within the Grantology community,  but out of all of this heart ache and worry, it is beautiful to see what great people we really have here in the Congregation of Grantology.

Here is what Brother Flemming said to one of the recent victims

Brother Marley, we are so grateful to have you as part of our growing family. You will soon find that this is the best decision you have made in your life, and it will yield a life of happiness and blessing. We are very sorry about the incident regarding your personal information and we can assure you that the serial rapist has been apprehended and will not be causing you any trouble. Lastly, please remember that Grantology requires devotion and sacrifice, and failure to please Lord Grant can cause serious repercussions. Do not fret, my brother, as long as you are faithful and pure you will have nothing to worry about.

Hail Lord Grant!

Gains Flemming – Prestige 5 Grantologist

Click here to join the family today!

Another Incredible Testimony

I sat and I realized that there has to be more to this life. I had been beyond depressed for almost 18 years at that point. I stand up, I turn around and bang. Standing in the corner of my room was a small black woman. I asked her, “what is your name?” She responded with, “Fear not you nugatory fool. I will grant you happiness and protection for life under one condition. You bring me two virgin boys and sacrifice them in the presence of Holy idols.” I was really confused, but all I could say was, “Yes ma’am.” She answered, “call me Aunt Jemima.”

Sacrifice

First Testimony Letter

Hello, I am George from Louisville, Kentucky. I joined Grantology last week, and I loved it. I could finally be passionate about something again. After my penis stopped erecting. I thought all hope was lost, but once I became a Grantologist and Lord Grant told me that all I had to do to get my peter back was sacrifice my dog, Joji, I was sold. Ever since that day I can just feel Cthulhu’s tentacles tickling my inner thigh, and it reminds me how powerful that Lord Grant is. The sex is great, and I never liked Joji anyway.